thinking of....

Daddy's going to heaven

hey little girlie,
why are you sucking your thumb?
is it yummy and tasty
like seafood pasta?
is the bone, flesh, skin and cells
really that enticing?

OH! little girlie
please don't cry
I was only asking you
why?
How would you survive
in a world like mine?
where the terrorists bomb,
the tsunamis come,
when the stock market crashes
and you are left with none.

where people look down on you
when you can't afford loafers.
here am i stuffed in a
tight business suit
waiting for clients to give me
some food!

why are you looking at me
with those big round eyes?
please don't, I beg you.
They remind me of
her eyes.
My dead daughter's eyes-

I lost her to my bitchy
Ex-wife
who claimed custody when
Amy was only 5.
I lost her to college and boys
when she was 19.
Lost her to leukemia
when she was 25.

She was all I had
then i had none.

I'm a poor old man
with nothing to live for-

So let me be,
little girlie with big round eyes.
Give me a break.
Take this penny,
get some sweets.
Stop sucking your thumb,
it makes you look stupid.

Go girlie!
Go!
Leave me be.
Let me go,
So i can jump off somewhere high.
To end this life.